Its all about a song

Hello,

Today i have posted few song that really meant a lot to me. Most of it the love songs that reminds me to those whom i loved dearly and whose loved me so much.

As a person who had amnesia like me, music gave a greater impact than anything else. Compared to pictures, diary or certain places, music can really overcome the sickness temporarily.

Terlalu Istimewa, by Adibah Noor - the song that i could never sing. Each time i hear this song, my tears would flow like a river. A miserable story of me and my 2 sons (Yusuf and Adam). Each and every time, this song never failed to make me burst to tears. 

Whenever i hear songs, it will automatically recap, what happen. Might be during that moment the song is the most playable. That's why it stuck in my mind. The song would throw a huge skeptical memories, which actually really happen but i just have a lil doubt bout it. Might b a confusion. But it really helps a lot. I think this not only happen to an amnesiac patient but to everybody also. Song can contribute to a wonderful terrible miserable memories. And it plays it part very well.

Hmmm, right now, i am in the not really peaceful state of mind, i am sick and emotionally torn down. But everybody knows Bie, the girl who shine and smile whenever, wherever and in whatever situation i am. Its just me. 

So, have a good life peeps. Happy weekend.

-the end-

Terlalu Istimewa (to my babies)



Ku tak tergambar wajahmu
Sinar mata itu
Lirik senyumanmu
Persona yang membelai
Wajahmu bercahaya
Memberi bahagia
Tiap yang memandang
Hati jadi salju

(Korus)
Kau terlalu istimewa
Kasih dan sayangmu terpancar
Seikhlas tiada batasan
Terus membara
Terkilan rasa jiwa
Inginku lihat mu dewasa
Apa daya
Tuhan yang lebih menyayangimu

Ku pasti kau berbahagia
Duduk di sampingnya
Mendengar cerita
Sekadar rahsia

(Korus)

Tak tertanggung rindu...
Mendengar suaramu...
Tawa mengusik jiwa...
Ohh...

(Korus)

Bukan Cinta Biasa



Kali ini kusadari
Aku telah jatuh cinta
Dari hatiku terdalam
Sungguh aku cinta padamu

Cintaku bukanlah cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang memiliki
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku

Terimalah pengakuanku
Percayalah kepadaku
Semua ini kulakukan
Karena kamu memang untukku

Cinta ku bukan cinta biasa
Jika kamu yang menemani
Dan kamu yang temaniku seumur hidupku
Terimalah pengakuanku

Pinjamkan Hatiku

Ini bukan lagu cinta kita yang dulu

Saat itu kupikir kau cinta matiku
Namun kini ternyatalah hatiku milik dia


Bukan engkau seperti kusangka


Oh, mudahnya kau lepaskan kata-katamu
Tak terpikir 'kan terguris perasaanku
Yang selamanya menyinta sedikit pun tak berubah
Kau buang sebegitu saja

Memang salah diriku tak peduli perasaanmu
'Kan kini dan hingga selamanya
Yang seharusnya tahu tak lagi di hatiku
Tak layak kau miliki cinta yang suci
Kita harus terima begini suratannya
Kusimpankan semua detik terindah
Dalam kenangan cinta
Tolong, maafkan aku
Kerna masa telah mengubah jiwa
(Kerna masa telah mengubah jiwa)
Mudah bagi dirimu
Ho-o-o-ooo
Kusimpankan semua detik terindah
Dalam kenangan cinta
Ini bukan lagu cinta kita yang dulu
(Kita harus terima begini suratannya)
Ho-o-o-ooo
Ho-o-o-ooo
Ho-o-o-ooo
Kerna masa telah mengubah jiwa
Kita harus terima begini suratannya
Mudah bagi dirimu
Saat itu kupikir kau cinta matiku
Namun kini ternyatalah hatimu milik dia
Bukan aku seperti kusangka
Hu-u-u-u-uuu
Tolong, maafkan aku

Too Good At Goodbyes


You must think that I’m stupid
You must think that I’m a fool
You must think that I’m new to this
But I have seen this all before

I’m never going to let you close to me
Even though you mean the most to me
'Cause every time I open up it hurts
So I’m never going to get too close to you
Even when I mean the most to you
In case you go and leave me in the dirt

But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry
And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry
And every time you walk out, the less I love you
Baby we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)
No way that you’ll see me cry (No way that you’ll see me cry)
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)

I know you’re thinking I’m heartless
I know you’re thinking I’m cold
I’m just protecting my innocence
I’m just protecting my soul

I’m never going to let you close to me
Even though you
mean the most to me
‘Cause every time I open up it hurts
So I’m never going to get too close to you
Even when I mean the most to you
In case you go and leave me in the dirt

But every time you hurt me, the less that I cry
And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry
And every time you walk out, the less I love you
Baby we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)
No way that you’ll see me cry (No way that you’ll see me cry)
I’m way too good at goodbyes (I’m way too good at goodbyes)

No...
(I’m way too good at goodbyes)
(I’m way too good at goodbyes)
(No way that you’ll see me cry)
Oh...
(I’m way too good at goodbyes)

‘Cause every time you hurt me, the less that I cry
And every time you leave me, the quicker these tears dry
And every time you walk out, the less I love you
Baby we don’t stand a chance, it’s sad but it’s true
I’m way too good at goodbyes

You are the reason





There goes my heart beating
'Cause you are the reason
I'm losing my sleep
Please come back now
There goes my mind racing
And you are the reason
That I'm still breathing
I'm hopeless now
I'd climb every mountain
And swim every ocean
Just to be with you
And fix what I've broken
Oh, 'cause I need you to see
That you are the reason
There goes my hand shaking
And you are the reason
My heart keeps bleeding
I need you now
If I could turn back the clock
I'd make sure the light defeated the dark
I'd spend every hour, of every day
Keeping you safe
And I'd climb every mountain
And swim every ocean
Just to be with you
And fix what I've broken
Oh, 'cause I need you to see
That you are the reason, oh
(I don't wanna fight no more)
(I don't wanna hurt no more)
(I don't wanna cry no more)
(Come back, I need you to hold me closer now) 
You are the reason, oh
(Just a little closer now) 
(Come a little closer now)
(I need you to hold me tonight)
I'd climb every mountain
And swim every ocean
Just to be with you
And fix what I've broken
'Cause I need you to see
That you are the reason

Removing the Alien



Hey Hi

Been so long since my last post. Not much too tell yet so many in mind. 

I just been discharged from hospital and now under recovery process.

Why?....

Chronology as below. Ewah...

29/9/2018 - My 1st EXTERRA Trail Run - the most hearbreaking run ever
1/10/2018 - My 1st day of menstrual - which should be on th 3rd
10/10/2018 - Heavy menstrual bleeding from 1st day till 10th day - abnormal
11/10/2018 - Heavy fresh blood bleeding with something feeling not right - abnormal
17/10/2018 - Something not right with the cervics - its about to come out. Whenever i pushed it back up, the blood flooded - suspected rahim jatuh or cervic / uterus prolapse
22/10/2018 - Calling Makcik urut to check the rahim - all normal she said
23/10/2018 - Going to GP (Klinik Perdana) to check - suspected rahim jatuh - medication giver for 7 days to stop the bleeding
29/10/2018 - Bleeding still not stopping - GP referred to Hospital Pantai Kuala Lumpur
30/10/2018 - Going to Pantai Hosiptal for further check-up - suspected a 5cm cervical tumor - bleeding is now on day 30th. Recommended for emergency operation to remove the tumor - admitted
1/11/2018 - Operation day - Removing the alien - Alhamdulillah all went well
2/11/2018 - Discharged - still in pain and ngilu - bleeding still on going
6/11/2018 - Today, bleeding getting lesser. Pain and ngilu also lesser Alhamdulillah

So that's the story. Never expected that this would happen at this time around. I do hope and pray for a speedy recovery.

I wish to say thank you and really appreciate for all the prayers, care and love. Thank you for visiting me. Thank you for the flowers and gifts. Thank you for my family and love one who really taking care of me. Really-really appreciate it..

Here goes some pictures:)